Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Club Dead: Chapter 11 - Rescues, Killings and Trunk Issues

Sookie sneaks out of Edgington's mansion, and steals a jacket because it's a bit cold out. What I don't get is that this bitch feels bad for stealing a jacket. She'll kill someone with no second thoughts, nevermind the fact that these people have kidnapped and are probably torturing the fuck out of her boyfriend. But taking a jacket...oh no, Sookie's moral compass finally shows.

Seems Sookie has hit a spot of luck - there are no vampires or people loitering around. Seem to good to be true? Any normal person would think so, but let's see, shall we?

She walks around a closed up pool and makes her way to the stables/garage. Sookie is very impressed by the garage, even though it doesn't have any doors. Yup, no doors makes a garage low class. Brought to you by Trailer Park herself. She does see a door as she's counting vehicles (four, in case you were wondering, which no one was) and almost comes because she's so relieved...because she has a car and thinks of her boy toy (Bill, not Eric) that's behind the one door in the garage. She starts the car and goes to clean out the truck so she can stick Bill in the trunk after rescuing him.

It seems that Sookie has brought along a memento of her stabbing - the stake. Who wants to be that will come into play if she needs it? Any bets? Is anyone that stupid? Nope, it's just that Harris is that obvious.

Sookie starts creeping around again and finally opens the door to where Bill is being kept. She's horrified. He's covered in silver chains, burned and all bloody. She approaches Bill, who's been sleeping/unconscious and he wakes up because he smells her (prolly her smelly, smelly vag). Sookie gets the key off the wall (you know, because that's where a master of torture keeps keys to their prisoner) and marvels about how strong Eric's blood has made her. She unwinds the yards of silver chain to get Bill out of them and they start to make their way out to the car Sookie has. They're stopped by an accented blond vampire who calls Sookie Bill's bitch. Oh oh mystery vamp...nobody calls Sookie a bitch and gets away with it. The mystery vamp? Bill's maker, Lorena (though I don't think you're supposed to know that yet, but I could give a crap). 

Sookie grips her stake and fumes over being called what she is. Lorena jumps on Sookie and, to my utter lack of surprise (for what seems like the millionth time in this series) stakes the hell out of her and says to Bill "Well, I killed her ass." Eloquent, Sook. Very eloquent. Also, her moral compass seems to have been lost in the last 5 minutes that she stole a jacket. She wraps what used to be Lorena in a blanket and makes plan to ditch the body, something Sookie is very proficient at. Sookie asks Bill if Lorena was the one who tortured him, and he says yes. She also wonders why a person named "Lorena" would have an accent. Um, why the fook do you have an accent, Sookie? Oh, that's right, because you're a hick from Bon Temps and are named Sookie. I'm surprised you can speak in complete sentences. 

Sookie gets Bill safely into the trunk and goes back to get rid of Lorena's body, figuring that if the body was gone, the people  at Edgington's house might figure that Lorena took Bill somewhere to keep torturing or whatever. Sookie lifts a pool cover and kicks her into the empty-ish pool. 

Sookie gets into the car and marvels over the luxury of the huge, gas guzzling Lincoln she's driving, then over Edgington's white, white mansion. She gets to the gate and chats with the werewolves standing guard. They ask her how her stake wound is, she says fine, and one of the weres (Doug, in case you were wondering, which you probably weren't) asks if she's going to come back for the crucifixion. Sookie wonders "whaafaa?" and leaves, immediately getting lost. She looks at a map that's in the car, and I know what you're thinking. How the hell is she going to figure out where to go if she doesn't even know where the fuck she is. She goes to a gas station and a lady at a gas pump help her to get back to some friggin' highway.  Then they stand there and grin at each other. Yeah, that's our Sook, grinning freak that she is. Sookie wants to tell this lady that Bill's all fucked up in her trunk, then thinks better of it.

Sookie drives away and goes over Bible scripture in her head. You know, because she's such a good Christian. Sookie gets back to Alcide's house even though she doesn't remember how to get there (she figures that there can't be too many 5 story buildings in Jackson - solid logic...) and a guard person at Alcide's house lets her in after Sookie promising not to rat on him for taking a shit during his shift. Sookie parks the car in the parkade and immediately falls asleep in the car. You know, because going into Alcide's apartment and actually sleeping in a bed would be too much effort. When she wakes up, she has to take a look at Bill before heading into the apartment, and when she opens the trunk, someone pushes her in. Oh oh...

Overview:  Sookie finds Bill and rescues him. Sookie feels guilty about taking a jacket because she's cold but has no problem killing a vampire. Sookie gets lost, finds her way to Alcide's house, and falls asleep in the car, only to get shoved in the trunk when she finally wakes up.


  1. I actually liked Debbie. For me, she kept the story interesting.

    1. I actually liked Debbie as well. Then again, I'm a fan of anyone who calls Sookie out